Day 60 Numbers 14-15, Psalm 90

 

My heart is heavy over today’s reading. I can relate to the Israelites. To be led out of bondage, through the desert ONLY by the Grace of God, then to finally see the promise land and be paralyzed by fear.. they were going to kill Moses and Aaron their fear had grown so big! I can relate to this, on some levels I really can. fear paralyzes me from realizing some of my biggest accomplishments and accepting some of the largest promises. When I’ve stepped out in spite of my fear taken the out stretched hand of the Almighty and leapt out into the great unknown TOGETHER we’ve accomplished some really big things.  You’d think I’d totally be over this fear thing… yet with so many things life has handed to me this year I find myself feeling afraid of my future.  Some of it really looks scary and I think, Lord how can I do this?!  How do I figure out which way is YOUR way in all this “filth” I find myself in?  lucky me, My God’s been busy providing me answers: 

“He lifted me up out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire, he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand.” Psalm 40:2 

‘Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, ‘This is the way, walk in it.”   Isaiah 30:21

  Lord, may this habit of fear in me be broken for good!  This broken vessel is still good for something, fill it, use it, even in all that We’re going through.. Use me.  Lead me to where YOU need me and let not fear be my guide.  YOU are my guide, and its high time I start following you.  Even though I did not choose some of these paths YOU still know where they lead,  My offering today is fear, anxiety, regret, sorrow and anger.  Take it today, instead I choose YOU.